champagne & black coffee

A lifestyle and fashion blog offering personal style & beauty tips, inspiration, and glimpses into my everyday life.

Life Happens.

July 7.   The last time I published a blog post or even logged in to my website.  It wasn’t on purpose and it wasn’t a preference, it just kind of happened that way.  My life and the lives of my friends and family have all been set into hyper-drive lately so certain things got prioritized and de-prioritized.  My lil side project blog received that latter treatment.  And that’s OK.

Guys, life happens. Every day.  And sometimes the really, really bad or the really, truly good gets poured on in abundance and all of the to-dos on the list become overwhelming.  It happened to me and it continues to happen to me and for the good and the bad, I am grateful.  For my mistakes and missteps, I am grateful.  For my positive outcomes, I am grateful.  For the unconditional support of my family and friends, I am grateful.  For the roof over my head, I am grateful.  I have one million and one things to share with the universe about some of life’s recent lessons, personal successes,  and struggles I search for help in trying to resolve.  And I’ll get to them, eventually.

Today I want to share what I want to focus in on and prioritize for my life:

1) Balance.   This sounds a bit contrived and cliche’ but it’s arguably one of the most important things.  Finding that balance between work and life, between happy and humble, between routine and spontaneity. It’s hard.  We all spend our whole lives doing it unsuccessfully most of the time.  And I think I can do a better job of achieving balance if I keep a more consistent eye on how I am managing it.  Be as thoughtful and meticulous with how you are managing your everyday life as you would with a big important project at work or the planning of a big life event.

2) Love.  This is the most overused AND underused concept on the planet.  Think about it.  We, as a society, throw this word around so much that it’s basically becoming meaningless. “I love your hair!”, “I love that show so much”, “I love ice cream!”, “I love that quote!”.  Everyone loves everything all the time.  One definition of love is an intense feeling of deep affection.  INTENSE DEEP AFFECTION.  That is a big freaking deal, people.  So for all of the things and people you really, legitimately love, how often do you tell them?  More importantly, how often and how well do you SHOW them?  For almost everyone the answer here is probably “not enough”.  I am so very guilty of this – assuming people know how I feel about them because it’s how I’ve felt for a long time or because I have told them before.
It’s not enough.  I need to hold myself to the same standards to which I hold other people.  In the past I’ve found myself frustrated with my husband for not being affectionate enough or for not doing as many romantic, for-no-reason things for me as he has before.  Or for something as silly as not giving me enough hugs.  But what have I done for him to show him how much I need him?  Am I any better? (nope) I’m trying to focus in on telling people how important they are to me through action.  Checking in to see how people are doing. Sending a postcard or leaving a note.  Telling people you love them.  Doing something nice for someone despite it potentially being an inconvenience.   Going out of your way to do something helpful for someone with zero expectations of reciprocity. Thinking of others before myself by default more often.  It’s tough.  This one will take work.

3) Simplicity.  Less is more in so many ways.  Less noise, less stuff, fewer plans, less screen time… more REAL connections.  More conversations, more focus, more being in the moment.  Next time you’re in a public place just take a look around.  You’ll see more than 50% of the people in group settings with their eyes and minds glued to their phones.  People take time to schedule dinners with friends and then sit there staring at their phone, spending the majority of their time on social media telling everyone about where they are sitting with their friends while not acknowledging them.  It’s ridiculous.  I do it, too, sometimes.  I want to be intentional with how I spend my time and I want to do a better job of being in that moment, away from all of the distractions we allow to creep in.  I want to disconnect so I can create better connections with people and with the world around me.
(Sidenote:  my friends Lindsey and Lincoln are a HUGE inspiration to me, taking this idea to a whole new level!!)

4) Health.  Plain and simple, make it a priority.   Eat well most of the time and exercise consistently.  Nothing too crazy other than just generally being nice to your body.  Nothing in excess, everything in moderation. I strive for this, although I fail often.

What do you want to change about your own habits?  What have you learned about yourself recently?


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